Category Archives: Uncategorized

Not My Suicide

*trigger warning* 
 
This can’t be me
I’m not the one sitting on the couch
The world digging into my heart
tears streaming down my face
no, no more tears
 
This can’t be me
I’m not the one holding my head in my hands
Fearing my own thoughts
Breaths coming quickly
breathe, just breathe
 
This can’t be me
I’m not the one lining pill bottles on the table
researching the MLDs
wondering how much time is left
Time, no more time
 
This can’t be me
I’m not the one drinking a second bottle of wine
pondering my very existence
Will I be missed?
Hope, no more hope.
 
This can’t be me
I’m not the one holding the knife
pressing metal to flesh,
tearing into veins;
blood, so much blood
 
This can’t be me
I’m not the one on the phone
calling for a lifeline
wondering if anyone can help
Help, just help
 
This can’t be me
I’m not the one climbing into the ambulance
answering 50 questions
losing consciousness
Lost, just lost
 
This can’t be me
I’m not the one waking up in the hospital
missing whole days
wondering where I’ve been
alive, just alive
That couldn’t have been me
I’m not the one near the end
my story is not finished;
I persevere
life, sweet life
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Image

Bipolar Diamante

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Sand

Failures:

When one door closes,

Another one opens.

A broken heart bleeds

Just for a little while

Then oozes memories for eternity.

Step by Step one moves forward,

But by looking back at the footprints,

One sees the clear path one must tread.

In the sand, the shifting sand,

The waves crashes over the foot etches

Washing the hard lines away.

Forgiveness.

Bipolar Diamante

Summer’s End

But the darkness still lurks behind the shadows of my smiles
and the chasm still lingers just beyond my tattered toes
and the voices still whisper their damning cacophony
and the end of everything still creeps just beneath my skin
Dare I give in?
Dare I listen?
Dare I glance?
Dare I feel?
Dare I sing the song I’ve sung before?
All is waiting for summer’s end.

Global Warming

Ice melts
Sea level rises
polar bears disappear
Oceans acidify
Coral bleaches
Beaches disappear
hurricanes intensify
floods deluge
homes disappear
Fire consumes
beetles populate
forests disappear
drought grows
air temperature rises
water disappears
Famine spreads
diseases abound
food disappears
Politicians argue
Warning signs ignored
Humans disappear

Grounded

Disappointment is met when eyes open
With the sun, discovery of humaness
Not fairy-like after all
No sparkling wonderness
Soaring above the Earthly plane
But mundane drudgery
sick with ordinary human condition
Grounded